January 30, 2008
Today saw a strong showing in the ever-present attempt of my sub-conscious to inadvertently get myself fired. I single-handedly built an immaculate case against myself, completely ignorant of what I was doing at the time. The case is as follows:
Exhibit A: Caleb recalls the ordeal:
This afternoon, I was trying to launch an e-mail campaign that had been on hold because of various technical issues. The issues were finally ironed out, and we got approval from the client to send it out. Matthew S___, the account manager for this particular client was pulled into a meeting right after approval, but he said that he’d have his laptop with him, so he could check it and give the final thumbs up after I had it all tested and approved on my end.
Let the record show that Caleb had absolutely no idea what the meeting was regarding, who was involved, &c, &c.
A little while later, everything was set to launch the campaign save for Matthew’s final go-ahead, so I sent him an IM letting him know it was ready.
About 90 seconds later, he stepped out of the meeting, and walked very purposefully my direction with an expression that I couldn’t quite read. He leaned over my desk and chillingly said, “Dude… my computer was hooked up to the projector, so that popped up on the screen… and those are Jewish clients in there.”
Exhibit B: Transcript of the IM that Caleb sent Matthew:
Caleb: Hey, have you looked at the final tests yet?
Stuart signed off on them
And so did Jesus Christ himself
Yeah, that last part was a lie
The Prosecution rests.