June 14, 2008
Road Rage
In Genesis 6, when God looked down upon the earth and saw the wickedness of man, I think he was watching how man drives.
Seriously.
June 2, 2008
Word of the Day
Latest word to be folded into everyday vocabulary:
poltroon /pɒlˈtrun/
–noun
1. a wretched coward; craven.
–adjective
2. marked by utter cowardice.
I also find immense joy in the related form: poltroonery. I just wish I had more reason to use it on a somewhat daily basis
Maybe it’s time to look for a job in swashbuckling.
May 28, 2008
Sticking It
I work next to a slightly shady operation named Al’s Plumbing and Air Conditioning. I call it shady because a few co-workers have had less than perfect experiences with Al’s. This morning, our faith in Al’s fell even further when we saw a small picket line protesting Al’s brazen ways.
That’s right. Al’s Plumbing ripped off his mother. The one standing next to him.
Apparently, Al’s sent out an A/C repairman that quoted her repairs at $1,500, which she went ahead and wrote a check for. Another repairman came out later to actually fulfill said quote, and after rummaging around a bit, told her that it would actually cost an additional $7,000 dollars to fix it. She (wisely) canceled the whole thing and found somebody else that did it for $600. But stingy ole Al won’t give back her initial $1,500.
These two were there most of the morning, but shortly before lunch, a police officer stopped by and talked to them for a little while and they left a few minutes after he did.
Sooooo?! Did the woman get her $1,500 back? Did Al finally see the folly of his crooked dealings? What is Al short for anyways? Alfred? Albert? Maybe Allison? Does Al even exist? Or is he just a figurehead or mascot created by some Franks or Rogers to make their business more personable? Maybe Al’s just a representation of “the man” for the purposes of this story to further illustrate the suppression of the common man by big business?
There goes my sleep for the rest of the week.
May 23, 2008
Conundrum
I’m feeling creative and expressive today.
Can’t figure out what to do about that.
May 10, 2008
Dislikeness
I was sitting in Starbucks reading earlier today and an older gentleman looked at me and smiled on his way past. “Conan O’Brien, eh? Haha.”
Time for a haircut.
May 6, 2008
Comrade Premiere
This morning, I was surfing around the interweb with a healthy dose of pretentiousness coursing through my veins, when I happened upon this ad.
Seemed innocent enough, until I noticed the word “premier.” Suddenly, all innocence faded from the world. I rushed to Dictionary.com as quickly as my fingertips could take me. Unfortunately, in this case, my initial response wasn’t 100% accurate. While I still hold on to my belief that is an oddly phrased ad, it’s not technically poor grammar. I was thinking that they had meant premiere, but it turns out that premier was perfectly acceptable in that context..
By the time I had fully completed my research, though, I had already thought through my mockery of such a foolish oversight and figured it a waste to not share. The definition of premier that works is as follows:
2. First in status or importance; principal or chief.
Fine, fine. Not how I would have worded it, but technically it works. They are the highest-ranked or most notable of Smoky Mountain Cabin Rentals. (Side note: Are the cabins premier or is it a premier rental of otherwise unremarkable cabins? Or maybe the cabin’s on a premier Smoky Mountain?) All that to say, my mind instantly jumped to this definition:
1: the person who is head of state
Specifically, a Russian head of state. Hence, I expected that the ad should look something like this instead:
I hate when English works against me.